Glimpses of Heaven

Today marks the wedding of Xylee and Dennis and of course we are looking forward to their life together almost as much as they are.  For me and Juanita it is a big moment for us as parents. Dennis is the last of our five sons to be married and like most big days, it’s a sad and a sweet moment of looking back and looking forward.  It feels a lot like the final boss has been beaten, the last moment of Christmas day before you fall asleep or maybe the last day of a wonderful vacation, the last day before you return home.

I hope you can forgive me for my ridiculous self-indulgence.  This little ceremony is a shameless victory lap but it was a hard-won victory that, for some reason, now comes to Juanita and I.  We arrive at this point where all five of our sons have not only have kept out of jail, but they all did pretty well by many objective standards.  They all are Eagle Scouts, all served missions, all graduated from college and now, today, are all married.  In Mormondom, that’s pretty much the long hoped for “living happily ever after” that ends every fairy tale.  I don’t think living happily ever after means that life is always easy, I think it means more that they were ready to face every challenge and did it together.  Like Juanita and I did.

I’ve been reflecting on what that “living happily every” after might mean.  Does it mean a lot of money?  Is it lots of friends?  Is it great health?  Is it respect and power?  Is it a lifetime of noble achievement?  These are all good things but I think it’s all these things together, all these things kept in balance so that none overwhelms the other.

If you’re like me, a man of humble means and ability, keeping that balance means you never pour all your strength into the accumulation of money, power, friends, health, respect or achievement at the cost of others.  This could make you look very common indeed.  But I am very surprised at the energy, industry, wisdom and care that is needed just to live an ordinary, common, everyday life.  It’s a lot tougher to be even just unremarkable than it would seem.

At this point I quote the former prophet Spencer W Kimball about happiness:

Happiness is a strange commodity. It cannot be purchased with money, and yet it is bought with a price. It is not dependent upon houses, or lands, or flocks, or degrees, or position, or comforts; for many of the most unhappy people in all the world have these. The millionaire has comforts and luxuries, but he has no happiness unless he has paid the same price for it that you can also pay.

You ask, “What is the price of happiness?” You will be surprised with the simplicity of the answer. The treasure house of happiness may be unlocked and remain open to those who use the following keys: First, you must live the gospel of Jesus Christ in its purity and simplicity. Second, you must forget yourself and love your companion more than yourself. If you do these things, happiness will be yours in great and never-failing abundance.

End of quote.  For me, looking back, the most satisfying thing I’ve ever done is be a father.  And with a lot of help from Juanita, it turned out pretty well.  Being a husband and father doesn’t seem like that remarkable of a thing—it’s very common—but somehow it feels like the crowning achievement I was sent down here to accomplish.

And speaking of being common, is that such a bad thing?  Abraham Lincoln said “The Lord must have truly loved the common man, he made so many of them.”  It’s part of the plan of happiness, the plan that allows everyone who qualifies to return to their creator, a plan that must be available to everyone, especially to the common man.

But the plan of salvation cannot be accomplished without the family.  Through their caring and providing, the family provides a temporal salvation.  Through teaching and example, the family provides an eternal and spiritual salvation. And it’s a great feeling to be part of it.

Okay, so I’ve rambled on long enough, let’s get on with the ceremony.  Yeah, there’s a short little ceremony at the end of this long speech.  It comes from a talk by Spencer W. Kimball called Glimpses of Heaven.  The occasion was when he was posing for his portrait and got a far away look in his eye that intrigued the painter.  So the painter asked him boldly if he’d ever seen heaven.  The prophet’s reply was unexpected and he said sure and he listed a number of occasions but they weren’t events of visitations from heavenly messengers. Instead the prophet recited a number of scenes from common everyday life where “heaven on earth” was evident.  The first portrait was a scene very similar to today, a temple wedding the prophet presided over and the father of the groom thanks the prophet afterwards.  The part of the prophet is played by my son Roger. The father of the groom approaches the prophet and says:

Common Man: Brother Kimball, my wife and I are common people and have never been successful, but we are immensely proud of our family. This is the last of our eight children to come into this holy house for temple marriage. They, with their companions, are here to participate in the marriage of this, the youngest. This is our supremely happy day, with all of our eight children married properly. They are faithful to the Lord in church service, and the older ones are already rearing families in righteousness.

Prophet: Success? That is the greatest success story I have heard. You might have accumulated millions in stocks and bonds, bank accounts, lands, industries, and still be quite a failure. You are fulfilling the purpose for which you were sent into this world by keeping your own lives righteous, bearing and rearing this great posterity, and training them in faith and works. Why, my dear folks, you are eminently successful. God bless you.

Prolog (Optional):  I told you that this was a shameless victory lap, eh?  The reason I wanted to do this so bad dates from many years ago (about 40), back to 1980 when I was a new convert and I first read the talk Glimpses of Heaven.  That one scene, the one we just enacted between the prophet and the common man, really struck me and I pondered it over and over again.  Which was weird because I was unmarried at the time with no prospects for a family.  I remember thinking, “You know, I think that’s all I really want out of life.”  But life is full of disappointments.  I also wanted to be an astronaut.  But this one was a wish that came true.  The fairy tale happy ending that actually came.  I am living happily ever after.