The Double Nickel

Back in the 80's, in a symbolic effort to "conserve energy", President Jimmy Carter lowered the top speed limit on all federal highways to 55. It was an unpopular move and overtime it was undone but for a long time "55", the double nickel, was our national top speed everywhere in America.

My father, commenting on his own mortality, said he was fine with the double nickel. Once he'd raised his family and accomplished most of what he wanted professionally, he was ready for the reaper. And 55 is about the time that happens for most guys who marry in their twenties and have kids within a couple of years.

I'm still within plus or minus 3 mph of that top speed limit and I have to admit, I really understand what my father was trying to say. It's a transitional time for both me and My Darling Wife (MDW). The house is almost empty and our child rearing days, so exciting and full of activity and promise, are quickly concluding. So what's ahead? For me, work until I retire, grow old and die? For MDW, perhaps she'll re-enter the work force or just take an early retirement. I think she's still trying to decide. My Mom never went back to work but she was quite a homebody and found lots to do to keep herself busy at home.

At times like this it's great to have somebody to turn to. My Dad for example. He told me that thing about the double nickel many years after he'd turned 55. Well into his seventies. For a long time, he'd worked as the sales manager for a mining equipment manufacturer. In the last ten years of his working career, they moved him to a new manufacturing facility and made him the General Manager. Nice. After a stint there, he came back to his old job as the new General Manager and retired as the top executive. So he accomplished a lot in those last years after he'd hit 55. Even after retirement he had some secret plans and clever tricks to keep working and he started his own business. He ran it for three years before selling out to his partners and finally retiring for real.

During his retirement years, we'd visit every now and then and I noticed that the mean old bastard I'd grown up with had softened considerably. I don't know if years of being a father finally softened him, if it was his immense old age, or if being a grandfather was such a sweet, carefree gig, he could finally afford being a sweet old guy. Whenever I think about it, I usually conclude that he was really always that way and if I wasn't so busy being an ungrateful brat as a kid, I would have been able to appreciate him better. I hate those sort of self-accusing epiphanies but in all fairness, I think it a real possibility.

When MDW and I first married, we started our family almost immediately. Most couples wait a couple of years but we didn't. I always told her that eventually we'd have our empty nest years and we could be sweethearts without a care in the world then. The good news is I think that's actually working. We spent most of yesterday trying to build this new desk we got from Staples. It came in about 150 pieces and had an instruction book with 36 pages of illustrations on putting the dang thing together. It took most of the morning and afternoon but it gave the two of us something to do together and it was pretty fun. I still like her pretty well it seems. We just like each other, even when doing stupid things like assembling office furniture.

I think there's a difference between old love and new love. New love is exciting, exhilarating even. Old love is more like a Mother's hug: reassuring and comforting. New love is like music from a dramatic scene in a movie that rises and swells. Old love more like a pleasant melody that plays softly throughout the day. The new love that had been so full of promise has fulfilled all its promises and you have all those years of accomplishment and adventure together to look back on.

Another saying my Dad always told me was that life begins at 50. Even though he's dead and gone, his example and wisdom are still helping me through my days. Thanks, Dad! You old bastard!